To dare, to dream, to win: August 2005

Sick..

sick, real sick, tired, no mood..
buggers, asses...

wasted 5 hrs playing dota with elvin just now.. gosh! 5 hrs. 9pm-2 am.. that's long. Wasted my time, wasted elvin's time. he shd be studying not playing, later mcvin come and slaughter me. Played 2 games with his friends. 1st one was super gg! Just when we thought we losing, due to gd teamwork and strategy, we turned the tide and won. Megacreeps on both sides.. 1st time i saw that. 2nd game was not gg though. Got thrashed. Lousy hero combi -_-.. we lack the help of the pros... i'm noob now also

Current song: Kelly's, kelly's and kelly's!
Going mad over her!!

lots of things left undone.. better use tmr wisely... ok i mean today. And 4hr 21min has passed !! for now.. slp!

Can't believe it..

lost my stationery. one yday, one today. Ok, seriously no big deal. just darn sway. Yday yl borrowed liquid paper from me during tut, and today mel borrowed staple. Then, the lesson after those two tutorials happen to be lecture. I lifted up my pencil case, which feel expectionally light.. of cos lar.. liquid paper n staple have substantial weight. Well, anyway those 2 just happen to VANISH into thin air. Of cos not they take one lar, but maybe there is some "stationery fairy" ard stealing ppls' thing. Or maybe i too tired, they return liao and i just forget to take it just like tat? who knows.. just darn sway, lend ppl things in the end lose them..

Mood: Feeling unlucky
Current song: Kelly's <<可爱的玫瑰花>> ...her voice is soooo sexy in the song, and her performance for that song is soooooo cute!

No mood..

to study.. havent touch my ess.. best! and i missed the tutorial.. how? must work hard.. always say tat but so difficult to adhere to it.. haiz.

going mad..

must regain my composure..

遗失的美好 rox!!!

Kelly rox!

So sad..

"bi sai shi chan ku de"..though i supported kelly, but i must say shi xin hui earned my respect. Sorry for saying she's a rabbit just now, but she's really a good singer, showing vast improvement and she's really better today. But i supported kelly since the start.. since she's way above the rest at the start.. but i must say xin hui dun have the luck, too many bad news about her and definitely she dun have the looks compared to the sweet look of kelly! =p anyway, the way xin hui composed herself even after she know she lost really touched me in some way. sometimes in these competition u need luck..hopefully xin hui can have some advancement in the music scene.
Poor junyang got out. ok who am i supporting? i also dunno. but jy better singer yday. People voted for weilian cos he's blind? maybe. who knows. Or someone is manipulating the results! Really expected jy to get it. Really shocking... so sad he got out.esp when he's chow's mum's classmate's son. Chow's nick is even "My mum's in love with her classmate's son" but ok, that's not the point. Think everyone took for granted he got higher points. most prob will get it. Looks like they are wrong. Very wrong. Hopefully he can get a contract offer also ...
A nite of unexpected results..

Trying...

to keep my promises.. definitely not easy. Tired. Just hope to sleep and not wake up. Lazy. Skipped lectures yday and today. Yesterday is bo bian. Today's is cos i lazy. But go so early for that one hour.. might as well watch webcast, esp even if i go, i still have to watch. But i must say webcast is a waste of time. Mood-swing just now. Sorry to anyone who got offended. Trying but success is the only result i wan to see...

Lost.....

Feeling..

dumb and stupid. Need better time management. Better find time to read more Sensei books. It will definitely help me.

I will do it

not even 1 mth and it happen again. Definitely not easy to keep promises. But something must be done. Everyone makes mistakes but if only say sorry each time and not doing anything about it then it's pointless.

To err is human,
and human i am.
I make mistakes,
well who doesn't?
Promises i have made,
promises i have break.
It was last straw then,
so death vow now?
Victory dun come easy,
perseverance is the way.
I will do it!

there's also something really meaningful and true in today's guidance.

"The purpose of faith is for each of us to attain happiness. The purpose of Buddhism is for each of us to be victorious. Please be deeply compassionate leaders who protect your fellow members without begrudging your lives."

I have to be victorious!
and let us be victorious together!

"Buddhism is about emerging triumphant. Victory, in whatever challenge or struggle, invariably bring joy. To be defeated, on the other hand, makes everyone downcast. Losers weep bitterly; victors shine with glory. That is why we must WIN IN LIFE WITHOUT FAIL. That is the purpose of our faith and our solid unity."

"Defeated.
once.twice.
Fallen.
But i will climb up.
140805.
Victory.
Nothing sort of it.
VICTORY!

! ! !

help the person in the comments.. =)

Wow..

just watched the repeated telecast of NDP '05. Partly is to see how our performance fare. Fiona xie seems to forget lots of the dance step. She train 1 time only, what to expect? But she sure is hot lor, her smile and shaking will cover up the fact that she forget the dance steps.
Anyway, our Soka performance at the Padang is rite after ours at tampines. After seeing that, feel a bit the touched. This year, our youths involved in YCF mah, so NDP left to the MDs and WDs (if i'm not wrong that is). The efforts they put in is cfm tremendous lor. Some of them understand only chinese or only english, communication is a problem, but yet of cos, the spirit transcends all boundaries. They come together to produce, once again, a beautiful performance/formation, which even show SSA colours of red, blue and yellow. Outstanding..

Arrgh.. change change change!

bought the black ink refill at $25 which is supposed to be for refilling 3 times. but ended up injecting the black ink into the wrong compartment of my ink cartridge, cos my black ink cartridge is not totally black. Ended up wanting to inject it into my other black ink cartridge. But alas! the ink is wat i used like 1/2 a year ago? and damn it, it had dried up, but TOO LATE.. inject liao.. waste 1/3 of the ink! F! and i even dirtied my house cos the stupid ink spurted out! -_- (but i cleaned it lar..)

Moral of story said to myself: Use my brain 1st b4 rushing to do things.

Pics and more to come!

Thanks chengyu for those pic he took.. fiona's so _______ .. fill in the blank urself

Why i not in this pic?

why why why?

All good things will have to come to an end..

Finally.. it's all over. No doubt i will feel the emptiness. Can't be helped. Though its true to some extent that after YCF it will be more sad, cos all the atmosphere and the people, the fun together, are all missing, but i have the mentalty that at least after YCF, we still have NDP... we all can still see each other.. but now.. everything's over.
But, no point dwelling over the past. Look ahead. Through this YCF n NDP, i have grown. Not only me, but all the participants, i feel. It definitely changed some people's life. Seriously, hope everyone will use this experience and everything they have learned in everything they do next time and if possible, to help other ppl. Dunno who will read my blog.. but then let's just do it!

On a lighter note, why why why? why i nv take a picture with fiona? darn! All camp outside the tentage for fiona to change finish, nv jio me.. dunno where i went and missed out everything! i shd be able to upload some pic of her with the rest of our bollywood stars. but, sadly i m not inside! and mr cj managed to take pic with weng qinghai when he just came! =
but nvm.. as i say above, all this is seriously not that important..hope everyone can really jiayou all e way in everything they do!

Nice fireworks..

beautiful 15 min of fireworks in sycronisation with the music played by the chinese orchestra. Cool! too bad nobody brought camera.. ended up taking pic with my camera phone.. lol.. nvm.. tmr will see fireworks at tampines! success for ndp tmr!

Mixed feeling...

Just reached home. A rather bz past 3 days. Anyway just came back from our NUSSD orientation cum graduation '05. Successful i must say. So many new frends and freshies turned up.. but i must say asking me to be emcee on such an important event is a bit..erm .. not to be so? Made lots of mistakes, esp at the very beginning. Fumbled so many times along the way. Oh sucks.. though ppl ard me say "Well done", "Good job", but then i know it myself. No doubt lar.. it's quite screwed up lar, somemore i prepared a script. But as bingyuan say, u might make mistakes, but ultimately, its the spirit and the sincerity which ppl can feel. But seriously thanks for those encouraging comments, from Louis, Bingyuan, so on and so for and to my ywd emcee, yiling, thanks for that encouraging sms =) .. but no matter wat, i know that this is a good experience and a platform for me to learn and grow, which i did.

It is a small victory for me. Of cos, not for the mistakes i made. but for the fact i dun even dare to speak out in a group but today, i did it b4 at least 70 ppl i suppose. i must improve and do better next time..

Anyway, say i say, the last 3 days was rather bz...
Fri nite: Went tampines ICA for our HQ3 post-YCF performance. Heard 2 very touching testimonials. Feel tears in my eyes after that. After that, went to find bingyuan regarding the agenda for today...think i am the only gan cheong one who actually do that, cos they planning to prepare everything today i suppose. Anyway, that ended at 11pm.. went home, did my script and slept at ard 240 that day..

Sat: Woke up at ard 820. . went down to help in the decor and the booklet... didn't really help much, sorry. By afternoon, i was in a stony mood. Lack of sleep + stress = STONE. Went home at ard 430pm while chye guan , guang ming and qian wei stayed back and helped with tat beautifully artistic decor =)

Sch's starting tmr... but not really in the mood though. Maybe cos i was kept bz with the emcee thingy these few days. Tmr after sch, maybe go with zh to scout for mp3 players. Going SYC for daimokukai at nite for the success of NDP on tue!.. and tue will be my date with fiona.. NDP '05 will be a success!

Just do it!

I just did it. No harm trying. Hopefully i can do it.. so much things on my mind. My MC thing, sch starting, this thing .... my mc thing so much not cfm yet... better do it later n tmr.. darn keep delaying things. must change!

=)

"My heart turns towards the storm,
My heart rings with thunder.
My heart, does it thunder in the gale?
No, I know it thunders in secret.
For in your heart I have found a spring;
In your heart I hope to find a flower in bloom."

Should I? thinking...

yes? no? can i cope? others have done it before.. surely i can do it also.. dun give excuses lar. at least try 1st and see how ba. U nv know the outcome till u try. Just do it !

Hmm..

i must say today M2 jason earn abit of respect from me. He is not the lowest point yday, yet when left with him and wei lian, he wanted wei lian to win. But i must say what if he got in instead? think he will be branded as a hypocrite lor. he seemed a bit expected that he will lose sia, showing no signs of sadness. Hopefully jun yang will win. Or wei lian. That derrick got too many siao young gers as fans.. buay tahan.
Expected silver to get out. But it was candyce instead. Maybe candyce nv really choose the rite song. Bit wasted. But wun be surprised if u say all of her good fren, chanel's frens all go support silver now. That IS possible. Double the vote. Not easy to go out lor. But kelly still ROX!! she will win!

Damn BHB..

Was reading today's (040805) Straits Times section, Urban. Must check out page 11 of Urban. "So far Urban has been featuring good-looking guys or gals but not both together. I have taken the liberty to attach a picture of my girlfriend and me..."
Everyone shd see that picture of the guy who knows who realms of saying that himself is GOOD-LOOKING.. oh what the hell, please look at urself in e mirror b4 saying u urself is good looking can? Think i saw a pic of beauty n the beast more like it.

Time now: late late

why m i still awake at this time ?? added chye guan and guang ming to msn.. was compiling the contact list for our block and talking to them both hehe. Finished all i have, ard 28 ppl. hope there is no mistakes.. maybe got chance can print out let them check. Hopefully can get all the contacts of everyone, must make it complete!
Anyway, 12+ CG gone to slp.. so ended talking to GM. talked quite a lot. serious stuff and crap stuff. .haha.. Anyway, talked about why i joined soka. Hmm, it give me some vigour and motivation to take up the job of the MC this coming sat for NUSSD orientation. Wonder how many ppl will turn up. Think stage fright is a cfm thing for me. Somemore can't believe the whole world seems to know that i'm MC for such an impt event, well everyone, except me that is. Dunno if i'm the only person, or is there a ywd with me also (cos according to mh, last few orientations got both ymd n ywd) blur*! actually i supposed to be freshie also lor, why i become MC sia.. dunno wat to do also lar.. started preparing my script for the actual day liao, maybe can give mh vet or sth. well, that's the most i can do. Maybe other ppl can impromptu lar, but think i prepare also might cock-up.. must chant lots!
Anyway, quite happy zh got gold for ippt. told ya gold is OURS. he train running with me, he must get gold lor .. anyway, so happen that jason ask if we wan to chant or not and well i did chant for him.
Got my gen bio mod.. 388 pt.. cant believe the other time slot, which have less slots, and the vacancies got snapped up even fast, is going for only 350 pts..but well who cares.. 6 mod, 23 mc, no matter wat, i must do it. "TOGETHER ALWAYS WE MUST FIGHT, TOGETHER WE MUST WIN!!"

Damn idiotic..

NUS students damn brainless and last min.. tmd all can't bid earlier. Rd 2a is open for 3 days but ppl just like to do it last min. Can't they just bid earlier instead of all logging in the same time now, causing the whole system to be freaking lag and each page to take like 3 min to load? darn it. and i can visualise many kiasu ppl still wan to keep refreshing to see if they are outbidded. Why didn't NUS do something abt this stupid lag? hope some ppl complain about this shit..top 10 universities-wannabe can't even do something about their system...

PS. Anyway if u think i am one of brainless/ last min students, sorry .. i bidded b4 hand liao.

hehe

oopss.. becoming more of a pic thief nowadays... Sorry lar, i no digital camera mah..and i wan to share about our ycf so just kop pic from other ppl's blog.. paiseh ah. .hehe. Anyway, did tell some of u how magnificent the formation of gym core is, but nothing to substantiate it. So here's a pic of it! See high they go!

Gym core performance at YCF

hmm

If someone say u are good, but u are still not quite there, make sure u improve till u reach the expectations of others

Change it!

yeah..change to a new tagboard by tag-world.com.. why wait for infinitely long for tag-board.com to restore? doubt it will recover anyway. Dunno wat happen to tag-board.com.. probably someone hack into it and crash the whole system. Ohz watever, since they can't do anything to restore the system.. might as well change to a new one..

Lack of sleep...

4hrs slp on fri, 5 hr on sat and 6hr yday. Results: Lethargy and muscle aching since sat. Worse still, acne eruption.
Had a knock out 3 hr sleep just now.. super shiok. Wanted to wake up after 1 hr but didnt. Might not have woke up if not for an sms. Now wondering if the sms is good thing or not. I better nurse myself back with energy!

A small victory ..

the bz 3 days have passed. A small victory scored. Attended all the things on these 3 days. NUSSD meeting on fri.. ippt on sat morning where i got gold, ndp preview rehearsal, a success with a high spirited performance we put up, though i must say i'm bit tired then, my performance isnt tat great. But i promise to do the best on the next/last training and the actual day. Today's soccer match is fun. The field's still muddy from yday, got darn dirty but who cares? it's fun. Met up with jc class just now. 9 ppl turned up. 9/26 but i think quite good liao. OK it's 8 actually, cos tanny not our class but close enuff to be one of us.. hehe.. quite good to catch up with them.. quite long since the last time. Stayed at cafe cartel from 7+ to 9+ .. had a good dinner and superb chat and lots of luff.. hehe
Oh ya, the gd news.. think the daimoku chanted by everyone really work, such that EVERYONE is going perform on the actual day! woot! really this is really the best possible outcome!

To dare, to dream, to win

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Sunday, August 28, 2005

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Sunday, August 21, 2005

Friday, August 19, 2005

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Monday, August 15, 2005

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Friday, August 12, 2005

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Sunday, August 07, 2005

Friday, August 05, 2005

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Monday, August 01, 2005

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